Finding peace again.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Monday
Stayed at home...not daring to leave my home...not wanting to face the world...just wishing to stay in the protection of my room...a shell of who i am...there wasn't much i could do other than ranting to myself...trying to fix the mess my computer has become...tried to trace back the history...the past conversations...almost lost your link...almost...but i'm glad...i got it back...but as of monday...i was still lost...not being able to know how you're feeling and all...i saw it coming...just as i always did...alas...i never seem to stop..until its too late...

Tuesday
Woke up, had lunch and left for sch...was early...met up with Jac to discuss abt the future of our Christian grp in TP's track & field...pretty small in number currently...hope the new batch will boost our figures...i'm glad i'm in the team...though i may not be a very strong contribution...i pray tat i'll be able to motivate those ard me...if tat is possible, then it doesn't matter even if i'm in reserve...the glory i seek, is for the Lord...

Waited ard till 6...by then most of us were gathered...it was drizzling pretty heavily...so we did our warm up indoors...coach came just in time...so we started our drills...rain had stopped by then...pretty fun being back for training...but my stamina...and i'm pretty slow...i'm not able to accelerate at sprinting yet...nor can i keep up with the others...i'm determined to do better...my goal for now is not to be the best...but at least amongst them...
My track mates are my inspiration...if they can be tat fast, i've gotta keep up...maybe its the fear of losing out?
To me its a good sorta fear then...one tt will keep me coming back for more...but i need to push myself harder...though my other commitments are draining me...Teens Search, Church, School, Camps and Track & Field...i think for now...ttz where my energy is spent on...

It was nice to know the 2 new members...Timothy from St Patrick and a gal from STC...dun really know who she is though...the guy is pretty good...so i'm glad to see him in the team...the gal, i din really observe...but i think she's pretty on par with the rest of the gals...haha...after training, headed to get bubble tea...followed as the borrowed vcd's before walking home...so much on my mind...so lil time to think it through...

The bus ride alone...ttz what i need too...



4:31 AM

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Jason Tan. Male. A true-blue Singaporean. Oldest son. 07.12.1987. Thai-Chinese.

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