Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Hey all...here i am...to rant again. =)
I wonder...what could it be, that could make you...make someone who you once called yours, wait out there while you handled a phone call. Was it so important that you couldn't let him just enter and wait? Alright, you mentioned that it was something impt and urgent...but still...was it necessary?
You claimed that you needed to study.
Did you?
All he asks, is just to be near you.
Not to do anything even...just to be where you are.
He was in your room yesterday, but it was empty.
Why?
You weren't around.
You told him that you had an interview to go for, and after that, you needed to study.
Fair enough...
Yet when he went over, where were you?
Hoping to cheer you up, to bring a lil surprise to sustain you through the night, thats all he wanted to do.
Instead, you shouted at him.
You told him to get out.
Why?
Because you hated it when someone invaded your privacy.
It was the same before he knew you, when he knew you, and after he left you.
Privacy.
Whats there so precious, that you had to keep to yourself?
In the past, when he looked, he found out that you were lying to him...
Yet, you still blamed him for looking.
Both were wrong.
Was it necessary?
Why'd you have to hide, tell him half truths, lead him on?
His life was in your hands so to say.
He wanted to settle down with you in future.
Did you feel the same?
After he left, how have you been?
Did you think of him?
Did you realise that he's in misery?
The periods of loneliness tore him apart, and they still do.
There he was, stuck and unable to reach out to you.
Yet...where were you?
True...you suffered much pain as well...but didn't you carry on?
He's selfish to say that you're happy...who shouldn't be?
But when you moved on...didn't you know the damage you did along the way?
He misses you.
Everytime he's out, he just hopes to see you again.
To spend his free time with you.
In the past, when you both were studying, it was he who was busy.
When you were with him, and he was in army, you were busy.
Now, that you're both apart, your life totally excluded him.
Imagine him without you.
He was lost, confused, afraid.
He still is.
He cries alone at night.
Before he left yesteday, he broke down in front of your brother.
He didn't want to, but he couldn't hold his tears.
The way you spoke to him.
After all...he merely wanted to see you.
As he walked away, listening to the songs you left in his mp3, a gift from you, He thought about the past you both shared.
Every song, every moment and every step along the way, he's shared with you before.
Even as he types this down, he's tearing.
Why?
Ask him then.
Why doesn't he give up?
He said he would.
That you're not the one.
But along the way, he realised, that he too, hasn't been doing his part.
He kept asking for chances, to prove that he'd change...
He didn't in the end, thats why you're gone.
Now he's asking again.
Answer me please,
For I am that "he" that has been mentioned.
Let me hear from you again Jac.
10:43 AM
